This is my first blog and I find myself censoring my thoughts and words, like I don't want to express the deep stuff; the harder, truer topics that detail the struggles and challenges throughout my writing experience. I like to believe that when I'm writing a character they are vulnerable and transparent--they hold nothing back and speak from the heart--but writing from within my own skin is an experience I've yet to find comfortable or even enjoyable. I can't hide behind someone else's eyes or flesh, and that's terrifying.
I consider myself a very private person. I mean, go ahead, ask me whatever you want and I'll tell you the truth, though that truth might be diluted. Example:
Them: "What do you do for work?"
Me: "Oh, nothing."
Me: "What do you do?" (Usually they'll talk about themselves. But not always.)
Them: "Well, what about hobbies? What do you do in your spare time?"
Me: "Umm... a few things. Mostly writing."
Them: "Oh okay. Like, what? Novels?"
Me: "Yeah. Hey, I've got to pee, which way is the bathroom?"
Of course, this example is also an example of the diluted truth that I habitually give.
This blog is a new journey. And I'm apprehensive. The thought of a blog is so cool: a free space to share and explore and express.... but then you start it and you realize that sharing and exploring and expressing is kind of daunting. I don't want to have a topical, boring, superficial blog! But I realize it might take some time to get comfortable writing in my own skin and not a character's. So bear with me.